Friday, 6 February 2015

A New Year, A New Beginning (And The Return From My Hiatus)

Hello readers! I’ve finally decided to return from my hiatus & I apologise that it’s taken a while. Life has been a bit here, there & everywhere since my last post, been busy with various things & because of other things I haven’t really felt like blogging. In fact, I’ve attempted this post a few times, but each time I just haven’t felt it, however, I feel that what I’m going to say needs to be the first thing I blog about upon my return as it will give context to any future posts, plus will answer some questions that those of you that know me IRL may have.

So, what is it that I feel the need to tell you? Well, my readers, I have made my biggest life decision to date- I have left Uni. “But why?” You may ask, well, allow me to explain:

To get to the point, I’ve decided I don’t want to be a graphic designer anymore. Now this isn’t a decision I made overnight, I’ve been uncertain of this choice since the end of last academic year when I started this blog, & although I enjoyed my course more upon my return, I ultimately decided it isn’t for me. I’ve been studying graphic design & it had been my aspiration since I was about 14, which was when I first started messing around in Photoshop. At first, I thought it was all about making things look nice & interesting, but when I got to college I started to explore a little more in-depth into the subject- learning about grid systems, typography & although my college course had it’s down points, it was a great course & I learned loads, plus I made some great things. Although I could’ve left education there & attempted to find a job in industry, I felt I wasn’t quite ready for the “real world” & that going to University would enable me to enhance my skills & get me experience in the industry & contacts. Oh how wrong I was.

University, if anything, did nothing to benefit my graphic design skills. Sure, I learnt a little more about what graphic design entails & got a glimpse at what the industry is like, but I personally think I haven’t made anything portfolio worthy since college. As you may well know, as I’m sure I’ve blogged about this at some point, I had some really demotivational lecturers in my first year & I started to lose passion for it then & actually said to myself that if I still didn’t enjoy the course after this first semester, then I would leave. However, I ended up enjoying it more, but in the stress & pressure leading up to my hand-in, I realised that this wasn’t what I wanted in life, & although I enjoy making & designing things, I’m really not that interested in graphic design on a deeper level.

I felt that graphic design was taking over my life. In college, my free time was minimal due to the amount of coursework I was doing. University increased this lack of free time- I found I’d feel guilty if I took time out to do something I enjoy, like watching a TV show, as that could be time better spent on coursework. Or I wouldn’t text people or socialise much as I wanted to get on with my work. So I thought- is this what I really want to do for the rest of my life? Do I really want a job where I’m literally working full time? Lecturers in my first year went on about staying up until 4am to finish work & meet deadlines- that’s not what I want. Plus graphic design isn’t a stable career- you’re up against everyone else chasing clients. I don’t want that either.

Here’s what I do want from life:

What I want is a stable job. A job where I can work set shifts & at the end of that working day I can come home, relax, & have time to myself. Play Sims, watch TV, do art for fun! I want to go to bed at a reasonable hour & if I do stay up late, it’ll be because I’m engrossed in a book, a TV show or game of Sims, not because I’m worrying about if a typeface works or what paper stock I should use. I don’t want to be chasing clients & competing with someone for my next paycheck- I want to know what I’ll be earning each month & have something stable- as long as it keeps me, fed, sheltered & clothed then that is fine by me. And at the end of the day, that is what matters. That, & being happy.

So what am I doing now? I’m taking some time out. I have a part-time job where I can gain extra shifts, & when I’m not doing that I can do whatever I please! I’ve gotten back into reading & am getting through the Futurama seasons. It’s great being able to watch things, chill out & just sort things out- even go into work- & not have to think about coursework & deadlines & how time spent on other things is affecting that. Eventually, I’ll get a full-time job, but for now I feel I need a break. I just need to sit back, enjoy myself & have some quality Amy time. Sure, I’ll still do art, but it’ll be done on the side & it’ll be stuff that I enjoy. Who knows, I could start to earn a few more extra pennies if I put more things on my Redbubble (or even start an Etsy page)?

And there we have it. A new year, a new beginning for me. As for this blog, I do want to get back into it like I did, but posts may not always be Mondays & Fridays. I may start to do it more sporadically, however, I will continue my music challenge until it finishes. After that, I’ll see what happens.

Thank you all for reading, if you do have any more questions, feel free to ask in the comments section below. I’ll be back Monday with my Music Challenge. J

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